Paid in full sounds like orgasm if you say it fast
I Really Have To Pee
When the teacher tells me the kids aren't behaving on the bus, during the SIX field trips the school planned during the LAST TWO WEEKS OF SCHOOL, I hear "mommy I stuck my finger in the electric socket and it hurt." I mean. Duh.
TFMF (Total F*ing Mom Fail)
Mwahahah. I emailed my friend, the one with the starving children. 1) If you feel like you are failing, because your kids are nice, chin up, I sent my kid to school with dog biscuits for lunch. 2) If you want to stop the marauders from taking your kids food send them to school with dog cookies disguised as human cookies one day. 3) Your girls are nice, kind and empathetic, you aren't failing.